It’s a word I know well.
Too well, if I’m being honest. And in an effort to always stay true and authentic (and to balance out all the checklist, super tidy, hand sanitizer carrying, washed, dried and already folded my laundry kinda Moms out there) I’m here to tell you, I’ve had quite the issue with procrastination.
I started my affair with Mr. P in my early adulthood- probably earlier- AND clearly still have a very hot and heavy relationship going with Mr. P to this day!
Yikes that sounds creepy…but in all seriousness, It’s been a problem for WAY TOO LONG.
I can usually find 4 or 5 other things to do besides what actually needs to be done.
I mean the room had to be picked up, and the laundry had to be folded (just kidding..we’ve established I’m a repeat tumble dry to de-wrinkle my clothes kinda Mom… see…avoiding folding the laundry)!
Now lets add these things to the easily side-tracked Mom:
- A full schedule with kids
- School drop off and pick up
- A part time job
- All of the kid’s extra curricular activities
- Making sure the little humans are fed
- And all the other stuff in between that is done on the daily
You can clearly see how all of the items listed above contribute to being an all around PRO Procrastinator!
Reasons behind my PROcrastination
In the past, there have been 3 reasons I have avoided getting something done in a timely manner. Read through these and see if you can relate to any of these:
1.Fear of Failure: This is probably the number one reason I procrastinate. I mean, will I fail? Will I put all this effort into something only to have it bomb?
Look, if I procrastinate and it DOES end up failing at least I have the excuse of not “really” being able to put my 100% into it anyhow because I “ran out of time”.
So, I didn’t really fail… I just ran out of time. I mean that’s a legit excuse and hey, I can avoid feeling a total truckload of shame by using that lame excuse to shield me like an umbrella in a hail storm.
The biggest problem with this is the guilt, shame and anxiety will still loom over our heads with or without the excuses…the storm won’t stop just because you took out an umbrella.
2.Fear of Success: Is that even a thing? I mean how can someone fear success?
Isn’t that what we all want?
To be SUCCESSFUL!
Well, let me break down what might be happening deep down. If I get something done on time, and it’s a success… or it makes my life easier…or gives me less anxiety… or just produces some kind of change in my life then I’ll have to pony up and actually be better!
My life will change and with that change I’ll have more responsibility and there may be bigger expectations of me in the future.
So, why not keep myself safe from facing my true limits by completely dodging challenges and putting things off. UGH! yep, this is a thing..and it kind of makes sense right… I’m comfortable living my life in chaos and in the anxiety driven emotions that procrastination brings.
Unfortunately, we may be missing out on a form of freedom.
Yes, there may be more expectations of you, but what if that also brings on more respect and more trust?
You can embrace the change by looking at the bigger picture… maybe you’re “safe” from the hail storm because you’ve got your trusty umbrella over your head..but what if all you had to do was step to the left only to discover there was a huge overhang that would totally shield you from not only the hail, but also any type of storm that came your way!
Freedom from holding that umbrella and a sort of relief knowing you’re truly SAFE from that hail (shame) storm!
3.Perfectionism at it’s finest: It HAS to be perfect!
It’s got to be done RIGHT!
I can’t do it this way because that’s the wrong way!
Being paralyzed with the belief that things have to be done perfectly can be down right debilitating! The fear of doing it wrong can just shut you down completely resulting in absolutely nothing getting done at all!
The paralysis of impossible standards are real.
Maybe you can relate…maybe you are nodding your head in consent to these black and white words. It’s overwhelming and so frustrating to feel like you might not do it pretty, impeccable and precise.
Okay, I get it, it is a glorious feeling to “get it right” and man, when we hit that home run there’s something dazzling and gratifying about that praise you receive!!
But stay with me guys…
If you never get out to the plate.
If you never pick up the bat.
If you never take that swing.
You won’t ever even get the chance to hit that home run or that tripple or even that double!
Hopefully I didn’t lose you with my baseball analogy..I’m big baseball fan…but you get what I’m saying right?
If you never at least swing that bat, you’ll never have the opportunity to hit the home run. Hey even if you make it to first base, that’s awesome.
No strike out!
BUT… if you do strike out, guess what? You probably got the chance to learn from it so that the next time you’re up to bat, you get it right and make it over the fence!
So the Reason’s Vary, but the End Result is the SAME!
It’s undeniable that there are different reasons behind our procrastination, right!?
Well, let’s be clear on the fact that although the reason’s we procrastinate vary, and the end result will always lead to the repetitious loop of anxiety (fear), avoidance (procrastinating) and shame.
Seriously, it’ll always be the same. Nothing gets done and with that comes guilt enabling you to enjoy life (that’s dramatic but hear me out).
Maybe you go shopping instead of doing your project (whatever it is…cleaning the house or that presentation for work)…Well, that shopping trip is fleeting and you’ll probably envision your boss being upset with you because you didn’t get the project done or you’ll loath the fact that you’ll have to come home to a messy house.
Either way, you can never really relax knowing you are procrastinating doing something that needs to be done.
Let’s face it procrastination will fail us every single time because avoidance doesn’t eliminate anxiety…it just postpones it.
Hope for us PRO Procrastinators
In an effort to keep this blog upbeat and encouraging, let me shed some light and say hallelujah for all the beautiful resources out there to help us overcome anxiety and beat procrastination!
Overcoming that avoidance game and becoming enlightened to certain skills is achievable!
I’m practicing a few things now because lets just say I am here for all the things that help eliminate the messiness and stresses life can throw at me! And if ya liked this post and want to know what I’ve been doing to help manage my affair with Mr. P, you can read this post I did on ways to avoid procrastination!