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Instagram scrolling.
Magazine sifting.
Mindless Pinterest Pinning.
Relentless voices in my head echoing the thoughts I’ve had as I’ve endlessly compared myself, my life, my house and my everything to the boundless ocean of unauthentic content available just about anywhere and everywhere.
This has been my life over the last few days.
It’s a trap that exhausts my mind and steals my energy and always leaves me feeling less than. Maybe you can relate, Maybe you also misplace your scrutiny.
What I mean is, maybe you also look to the things that make you feel worse than, even if you started out searching for something that would make you feel better in the first place.
That’s what happens. I start to feel a little sad or overwhelmed or exhausted so I turn to my trusty Instagram app or the local magazine rack and start searching through the pages and feeds in hopes for some sort of inspiration
Instead, I see things that aren’t my reality or my life and I begin the silly game of comparison.
So there I was laying in bed and staring hard at my insta feed …and this phrase kept soaring through my soul:
“Why am I looking out when I know I should be looking in?”
I knew I needed renewal. I knew I needed revival. I knew I needed something more than a post and something more than digital black and white social media words.
Putting It ALL Down
I wish I could tell you that I immediately hit the floor and got onto my knees and began to siphon energy from the one true source, the only source I know that can whip me back into reality and strengthen my entire world!
Jesus.
But, ya’ll I scrolled just a little longer and still half hoped I’d land on a magical post that would shockingly set me straight and make me feel “all better”.
Once I was done shaming myself, I walked into the kitchen to grab some more much needed coffee when I saw a stack of books.
A few were old, a few I had recently purchased, but they all had similar themes… Love yourself, find joy in the mess, passion over perfection…ect… My heart stopped.
That is exactly what I should be reading..these are the sort of black and white words I needed! But more than that I needed to get down on my knees and ask Him to just flow through me. I mean I had zero energy and I could not imagine doing one more “mom” thing that day!
So I did just that, I got down (and I actually put my phone down too).
I felt the tears immediately well up and I felt the rush of emotions come over me. It was as if Jesus was letting me be ME.
He was letting me just come to Him with all my emotional baggage and lay it in front of Him. All of the exhaustion, all of the mom guilt all of the weighty “I’m not as good as she is” feelings…ALL OF IT!
It Is ALWAYS About His Reckless Affection and His Gracious Love
Sisters, have you played that social media measuring game too?
Have you tried to measure your worth by comparing your life to that famous fashion blogger?
To that Home improvement feed?
To that fitness guru?
I know, me too!
It’s DAUNTING sometimes.
I mean yes, there are so many times that I can get some fabulous inspiration and some uncanny motivation that will energize me and launch my attitude up 4 notches…but it doesn’t usually happen when I’m already in a sad or low place. I’ll just start to beat myself up and gosh, that’s just not OK!
What I do know is that there is just something absolutely reckless about Jesus’ pursuit to fill you with love, joy, and true motivation!
He’s ALWAYS ready to fill our cup!
He’s ALWAYS ready to just wrap His loving arms around us and hug us until we have wept all the tears and told Him all of our exhaustion filled stories!
His grace is immeasurable and unfathomable.
More Food For Your Soul
So, as always I want to point you to Jesus, the ultimate coffee pot to fill your utterly empty cup!
Not only will He fill your cup with delicious fresh brewed coffee, He’ll make it taste so sweet with the yummiest hazelnut coffee creamer and top it off with whip cream and a generous potion of caramel drizzle!
But also in an effort to help fill your heart and soul with joyful things here’s a list of books. Some I have read and some are on my “to read” list!
- If You Only Knew by Jamie Ivey
- Girl Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis
- Eat Cake Be Brave by Melissa Radke
- Stretched Too Thin by Jessica N. Turner
- Pull It Off by Julianna Zobrist
- The Bright Life by Jen Wise
- Afraid Of All Things by Scarlet Hiltibidal
- Cozy Minimalist Home by Myquillyn Smith
If none of these spark your interest, I recommend physically going to the book store and browsing the shelves for something that stands out to you!
There’s just something magical about a book store!
